mas·sive ag·gres·sive

I woke up at 7:30am today after going to sleep at 2:00am. Why? Because I had to drag my ass to the 9-5 daily grind. I figured, if I was at least going to do that, then I was going to get some reading in early at work.

So, in the course of my reading, I came across an article that I literally ready 2 sentences from that prompted this post. I don't give a shit what time you wake up. You can wake up at 5am, or 3pm, who cares. It doesn't matter as long as you do something that day. If you don't have something that you can chalk up on the accomplishment board, then that day was wasted. 24 hours, poof, gone, say bye-bye, never-gonna-see-it-again, that-could've-been-time-spent-with-my-kid gone.

Now that's said, let's move on. I came into the office because I thought I had a meeting at 9am. I was here at 8:15am to get some work done. Some work that will not matter in the grand scheme of things because I did not personally help someone have a better day, a better relationship with a friend or family member, or help them get something done. I have nothing to personally show for the work I do Monday-Friday, 8am-5pm. I want to change that. My goal is to get to the point where I work for my friends, family, you (the readers), and anyone else I can to better their life, and if I can do that without going to the office 5 days a week and wasting a large portion of my life doing work that I am not proud of on a personal level, on an emotional level, then by George, I've done something.

Are you frustrated because you aren't doing what you want to be doing? Why are you making excuses? Why aren't you doing something about it? Why aren't you doing something that is directly related to what is making you frustrated? Why are you letting things get in the way of your massive aggressive mindset? Why are you letting things block you?

Roadblocks don't exist until you make them bigger than they really are. Then, they become obstacles. Obstacles lead to frustration. This is all because you are letting your wheels spin and not doing something about it.

When was the last time you finished a project, on your own, beginning to end? You made the rules for that. So why are you listening to rules of others? What got more done? What were you happier with? What gave you that sense of beaming accomplishment and that 4 year-old ear to ear grin?

So, everyone has something that they do well, something that they enjoy. This is doing the right thing, something you are good at and something that you enjoy. For me, one of these things is playing Rock Band on the drums. I'm good at it and it's a lot of fun for me to do. I have a lot of friends that insist I play and show off my skills when they see Rock Band and a drum kit.

I have other friends that like taking photos. They are incredibly good at what they do, and it seems like they make magic in freeze frame. I, for one, will never be as good as they will, but I don't mind this because it's not something I'm interested in. I love seeing their photos, of course, but it's not something I would do myself. I create some magic in one way, they create the magic in other ways. 

Now, doing it the right way. For every individual, when they do the right thing and get enjoyment out of it, they are doing it the right way. For me, this is playing the drums on Rock Band when no one's around and getting good scores and even full comboing a few songs (when you hit all the notes in a song and don't break streak). For my photography friends, it's lining up the right shot in the right light, having fun with whatever the subject is (guy, girl, neighbor's dog, that feisty looking plant, etc.), and keeping relaxed, all while letting the pictures happen when they do.

 The reason for this post is that I forgot all of this. I forgot to have fun when playing Rock Band drums. I've been working on getting a bunch of FCs and recording them for a project, and focusing on that rather than having fun. I was focusing on the fact that I was on camera, that I needed my timing to be just right, and I was making a ton of small mistakes. My FCs would come few and far between when in this focused mind set, when I WASN'T ENJOYING THE GAME. I had to take a step back.

I had forgotten to have fun.

So, I tried an experiment. Let the camera roll, if they happen, they happen. Don't count them, just play and have fun. I'm also trying different songs that I would not normally play. This is causing me to focus, but I'm having fun while I'm doing it. 

Next time you are getting burned out, stop thinking about what you are doing and just wing it a little bit, have fun. That's the key. That's when you are doing the right thing, the right way.

I'm going to tell you exactly how I go about my fears and how I conquer them. In one sentence:

Close your eyes and take the leap, because the only way fear works is when you let it hold you back.

This is one of my mantras when I'm facing something that absolutely terrifies me. I feel like fear is something that is overused and dulling to our senses. At that same token, when we finally embrace our fear and conquer it (not decide to conquer it, but actually CONQUER it), it makes that victory that much sweeter.

YOU decide if fear gets the best of you. You can make any excuse in the world trying to refute this, but it is true. Period. You make the decision to freeze at the last moment. You are the one that feels bad and says, "I should have done that." You are the one that doesn't fully commit to the project. You are the one who should be willing to risk it all, and have that feeling of gambling on the line.

Remember this acronym if you want to tackle your next fear: EMBRACE.

E for Examine: Examine your fear and see if it's legitimate (A lion is about to attack me vs. "She'll say no if I ask her out . . .").

M for Make Note: Make note of what actually scares you about this fear. ("I'll be embarrassed because she rejected me.")

B for Build a Plan of Attack: Build some method to move through this fear and past it. It can't harm you if you know what you are going to do. ("First, I'll walk over to her. Second, I'll introduce myself . . .")

R for Reassure Yourself: Reassure yourself that if it doesn't go exactly as planned, it's not the end of the world. ("So what if she says no? There are still plenty of women that will date me.")

A for Act: Act out your plan. THIS IS THE MOST CRUCIAL STEP. If there is no action, then you let the fear get the best of you. (*walks over* Hi, I'm Jarrett. You are? . . .)

C for Confidence: You already took the first action. The ball is rolling. Have confidence in yourself to continue proceeding past your fear. (*thinking* This isn't so bad . . . and she likes a lot of the same music I do!)

E for EXCITEMENT: You conquered your fear! There's nothing wrong with showing a big toothy grin or a couple high fives with your friends. This is what fear is all about. Conquering it. This should be a HUGE adrenaline rush at this point. ("I've got a date for tomorrow night guys!")

 Don't make excuses if things didn't turn out. Learn from it and change up your plan next time. Account for this mishap and implement changes so things don't turn out the same way next time. A scientist doesn't do the same thing twice expecting different results. You need to change the way things are set up. You need to be making it so the cards are stacked in your favor. You don't go to the bar after working a hard day out in the yard, still smelling of sweat, expecting to pick up women, do you? NO! You take a shower, shave, throw on some cologne, and brush your teeth. You stack the cards in your favor so a woman says, "Hey, how's it going?" instead of "Hey, you reek!"

Try it next time. Show a little confidence. It's okay, because 90% of the other people that are in the same position as you aren't making that first move.